Thursday, October 19, 2006

The Successful Self feels valuable
.self-accepting and self-confident

~ Dorothy Rowe, The Successful Self ~

Success is something we all desire. Getting
good grades in school, scoring points for our
team, winning the game, dating the homecoming
Queen or King, marrying Mr. or Ms. Right
landing a promotion, living on the right
side of the tracks - the list goes on and on
As much as we desire success, our experience
.of success is fleeting

When we're successful, it's rare that we
take the time to celebrate our natural talents
as creators. Instead, we set our sights on
our next goal - hoping to feel good about
ourselves when we get the larger house
fancier car or bigger paycheck - unaware
that the process of creation is what's
.truly important

We've been raised to believe that success
and failure are real. We perceive the world
through our definitions - labeling some
.experiences as successful and others as failures
If we get the job we've interviewed for, we're
successful, and if we're not hired we're
failures. If we marry we're successful in love
and if we divorce we're failures. The bottom line
is: Success and failure are based on the meaning
.we assign to a particular outcome

Why is it that humans who began their lives as
magnificent creations are so often walking around
feeling a sense of failure and unworthiness? We've
been programmed and domesticated, often unconsciously
to believe that we don't measure up to an outside
.standard of success based on a particular outcome
The truth is we're always successful because we're
always creating. While we may not enjoy a particular
outcome, we can seize the present moment and
successfully create anew. To embody success requires
taking responsibility for our actions and forgiving
.ourselves for believing we are failures and unworthy

As husband and wife psychology team Judith Sherven
PhD and Jim Sniechowski, PhD say: "You are always
succeeding. The question, is at what? Until you realize
that what you call "failure" is motivated largely by
unconscious loyalties to ideas and intentions that
date back to your early childhood, you are caught
in a powerless cycle of unending repetition. However
when you realize this, the door swings open to
forgiveness, of yourself and others, and a future of
".new, life-enhancing possibilities

If we could take action from this point of view
we'd never be afraid of failure because we'd
understand that there is no such thing. Without
the fear of failure hanging over us, we would be
.bold and adventurous with our lives

With all my love, Susyn _

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